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Characters:Ratchet, @pharma Location: Autobot Base - Medical Bay Content Warnings: N/A Plot Summary: It's been roughly a week since Pharma was brought to the Autobot base, and Ratchet couldn't be any more thrilled to have not just his mentor, but another medic working along side him. Just what will they be able to teach each other with the time they had apart from one another?
It had been one of those rare nights where Ratchet had actually achieved a good night's recharge, not at his desk or in the medical bay, but on his own berth. It had been an odd habit of his, but had been something he'd grown far too used to, even when he had been a student studying at Delphi. He'd find himself too wrapped up with his work or his studies that he would just pass out straight as his desk or.. wherever he had been at the time.
The medic could only imagine how many times Pharma had to deal with it.
Ratchet stretched as he got off of his berth, smiling at the thought of Pharma. He had been far too excited to have another medic around the base, but for that medic to be the one he studied under? It was the best he could have asked for.
A few stretches later and he made his was down the to the medical bay, he spotted that familiar face once he reached the entry way. He hadn't entirely been sure what the seeker had been up to, but it hadn't concerned him. Just seeing the mech there made him so incredibly happy. Pharma had been like a creator to him, after all.
"Good morning, Pharma. Have you been waiting for me long?"
Pharma himself had, rather than sprawled at a berth, actually hunched over a desk. It was a habit he had long since grown used to, to the point that most berths were actually uncomfortable unless they were designed with a Vosian's wings in mind. And those were few and far between in Autobot installments. Most of the Vosians who had sided with the Autobots were dead, prisoner, or deserted. He had been a prisoner himself, to be fair.
He yawned softly and stretched as he pulled himself out of recharged, feeling his wings starting to whir to life, surprisingly. They were already twitching, one of his first morningly stretches. He pulled himself up and gave soft clicking noises.
Just in time to see Ratchet entering. "No, I haven't actually. I just woke up myself and stretched my wings a little. They tend to get stiff in recharge." It was something he had gotten used to. Holding them stiff so they wouldn't droop to the ground and scrape along the ground. But that was because Vosian berths were few and far between. Such a shame.
Good. He hadn't kept Pharma waiting. The younger medic had actually been right on time to catch Pharma just as he had done some morning stretches for his wings.
He frowned momentarily at the thought, having forgotten that Vosians would use different kinds of berths that would allow for more relaxed recharges with those wings of theirs. It'd been so long since he'd been around a flier that it hadn't even crossed his processor until the elder medic had brought up the stiffness in his wings.
"If you want, I can take a look at your berth and make adjustments to it to the best of my ability. I can't promise it will be more comfortable for you, but I want to at least try."
Walking to a nearby dispenser, Ratchet grabbed a couple of energon cubes, returning to the desk that Pharma had been resting on the night before. He set them down on the flat surface, pushing one of the two cubes towards his father figure. "Perhaps some energon will do us some good before we officially start the day. Wheeljack brought a lot of energon back from his last.. raid."
It was quite humorous just how flushed he became just by speaking the Wrecker's name.
Of course, Pharma was chipper as ever in the mornings. He had always been somewhat of a morning bot as long as he could recall. Perhaps because his optics had come online to the light of the morning.
Ah yes, the wings were a bit of a pain on the berth he had. But that had been the least of his worries. They were stiff for a second reason, really. Nightmares. THOSE nightmares.
"That would be wonderful." His voice was gentle. "It'll at least make sleeping a bit more comfortable even if not everything can always be perfect."
He then sighed with relief when he saw the energon. "It would do a world of good. I've been...underfueled for quite a while. My ordeal at Delphi and all." He then chuckled. "Feeling a bit flushed are we?"
Not once had Ratchet considered nightmares to be the cause of his stiff wings and had assumed Pharma's stiffness to be the berth alone. He hated that he forgot such a minor detail that would make his stay more enjoyable, but he would rectify that error as quickly as possible.
"I know, and I'll do my best to make your berth more comfortable. With the limited supplies we have here, I can only do so much, but if the slightest improvement helps for now then I suppose it's better than nothing. I want you to be comfortable."
Hearing that the older medic had been underfueled due to his situation made Ratchet freeze. He himself had been cutting some of his rations due to the shortage of Energon, and reasons like this had only furthered his point. Pharma desperately needed Energon, and he refused to let him starve, but with two cubes before them, how was he possibly going to do it? Unless..
"Pharma.. why don't you take my cube? I can get myself another cube. I feel like you need it more right now."
Pharma pointing out how flushed the younger medic was only caused him to flush more. "F-flushed..? For what reason?" Totally not because he had mentioned Wheeljack, the one he felt strange around, but even he didn't quite know why.
Limited supplies. That he could understand. It had happened back on Messatine, back at Delphi. Supplies were running low and he was almost desperate enough to try to do unscrupulous things. Almost. He still had the scruples to avoid desperate things, though he still mourned the many patients he hadn't been able to save and the...unwilling donations of their freshly deceased T-Cogs.
"Thank you. Perhaps if the...small earth natives bring...soft supplies. Though I will not hold them to it." For a moment, his smile had a broken quality to it but he tried to hide it with the hints of a small smile.
He then gave the faintest of sighs. "No, no. Keep yours and get another for me...If there is highgrade I may need it." He gave that faint broken smile before a softer smile.
The older medic gave a soft chuckle. It wasn't the broken ones he'd had to force until recently, but an honest chuckle. Being around Ratchet was bringing some of the old him, the cheerful him, back out. The jovial teacher in him! "Your armor seems to have a bit of flush as though you are either...running at higher capacity than normal or...ah...attracted to someone?" He was somewhat playful with the last few words. It was likely the former--older mechs like he and Ratchet often did--but if it was the latter, he would be wanting to hear of it!
"I admit that the humans have had their share of uses, but I'm not certain how easily they would be able to obtain the supplies we would need. I suppose we could always ask Agent Fowler, the human we regularly see that works with the Earth Government, but I'm sure he's limited to what he can and cannot do as well. But regardless, I'm going to do the best I can to make sure you are as comfortable as possible."
Ratchet's optics widened as Pharma told him to keep his cube of Energon, stating that he would simply have another. The use of extra resources made him nervous, but.. Pharma needed the Energon desperately. One cube wasn't going to be enough, but.. had he already begun to figure out the younger medic's bad habits? "I.. have some high grade stored in my work bench. That's where I have been hiding it should.. you ever need it."
Primus, had Pharma been right though. As he went to grab a cube of high grade from his work bench, that's when he looked at his reflection and realized that he really was flushed. From the elder mech's best guess, the younger had a crush of some kind.. But he didn't! Sure, he and Wheeljack were close friends now and all, but..
Wait.. why was his first thought of Wheeljack?
Grunting a bit, he brought the cube back to Pharma, handing it off to him. "I.. I don't though.. I mean.. Ugh.." The younger medic shook his head, glancing back towards his adopted sire of sorts. "How.. do you know if you have feelings for someone?"
"True. It might look strange for them to purchase large amounts of cloth. Though I had borrowed some of the soft cloth to accomodate my berth last night. It...It made it bearable."
He carefully reached to Ratchet, carefully grabbing the cube of high grade. He bit his lip, then took a sip, the sweet taste hitting his systems and soothing him ever so slightly. "Mmm, I missed this. We only had the bare minimum at Delphi after...things happened."
Pharma gave a sheepish smile. "Mmm, can't get them out of your processor even when they're just in the back of it..." He then took another sip, half-lidding his shimmering optics. "Their presence makes you truly happy to have them there. You want them there for more than just their capabilities--but because you personally enjoy the actual TIME with them...mmm...reminds me of Cogwheel..."
Had that soft cloth really made that much of a difference for Pharma? Ratchet blinked in surprise, just happy that it had made even a slight difference when it came to making his berth more comfortable. "If.. it helped, then perhaps we should see if we can obtain more. I don't want you to be uncomfortable, and if there's something I can do to make things better, then I want to do it. You've been through so much.. it's the least that I can do for you."
Before taking a sip of his Energon, the younger medic let the seeker take a sip of his. Pharma was the one who needed it most, and it just made sense in his processor to let Pharma drink first. It eased the elder of the two, though Ratchet nearly choked on his own Energon at his mentor's statement. For some reason, it never came to his mind that supplies had been so low after whatever had happened.. with the 'monsters' that Pharma would refer to. He hadn't dared to ask what had transpired in it's entirety, but knew that doing so would upset the seeker further.
He couldn't do that to him..
"We have been.. tight on Energon as well. The Decepticons control so many mines, and we're doing the best we can to get Energon when we can." Wheeljack had been doing a great job of getting the substance for them, though it worried Ratchet to no end.
He took in Pharma's words, thinking carefully about what he was saying. Someone you can't get off your mind, being happy to be around, and wanting them there.. Primus, he hadn't gotten the Wrecker off his mind since leaving his ship once he'd healed! He enjoyed the time they had together, and even the time they got when he stopped by to drop off Energon. "Pharma, I.. I think that.. you're right. I think I might.. actually have feelings for Wheeljack."
Taking a large sip of Energon, Ratchet sighed as he tilted his helm backwards. "But.. even if I do say something to him.. what if he doesn't feel the same way?"
Pharma nodded softly. "I'd like that very much. It's...it's like the old time seeker nests..." He felt his wings perk slightly. "Thank you for being here through me throughout all the worst even."
Pharma blinked when he noticed how Ratchet choked on the energon, flitting a wing slightly. He then leaned in. "The war's been so tough on supply lines and then...that strangle they put on the supply lines...don't think about it, please." His tone became somewhat strangled. "Please..."
He knew he couldn't talk about it.
"I hope you guys have a few wreckers." He gave a wry smile. He then dropped his wings. Maybe it wasn't so funny to be saying that at a time like this.
It was Pharma's turn to nearly choke on his energon. While he'd just given advice, for a moment it seemed surreal. One of his students, one he saw as a son--would even call his son at times--was in love. A piece of him was a proud father. But a piece of him was envious, even if he hid that well. "Good. Seize onto happiness like that. Like him."
He then paused, lowering his cube completely. "As long as he's still invested in being there with you..."
"Pharma, you.. Don't have to thank me. Really, you don't. I would do anything for you because I care about you, and I want to help make things better for you.. even if just a little." While Ratchet didn't know entirely what Pharma had been through, he knew that he needed the support. Naturally Ratchet would give him any and all the support he needed, give him every comfort he could until Pharma was alright again. It wasn't a one day fix, and he knew that all too well. This would take time, and there was always that chance that he would never fully be the same mech he'd been all those vorns ago, but the younger medic had to try.
Though it wasn't to say that Ratchet himself hadn't been through so much when it came to the war. All of the stress, the loss of their planet, being the only medic for so long in their group, plus the Energon shortage? That had only been the beginning! But Pharma didn't want him to think too much on it. Certainly easier said than done. "I know.. It hasn't been easy, but with you here now.. I know things will be better. Trust me. I'm.. not alone anymore. In terms of being the only medic, that is."
At the mention of Wreckers, he couldn't help but smile a little. Naturally his processor immediately went to Wheeljack, but he was able to bring his mind back to the present in order to respond to Pharma. Wait.. why were his wings drooping? "Well.. we do have a couple of Wreckers. One is completely immature and far too young to be doing this sort of job. The other.. well.. Is the one I was referring to. The one that.. I think I like."
He grew concerned as Pharma momentarily choked on his Energon, only relaxing once he was sure that the other mech was alright. If this truly was love he was feeling in regards to Wheeljack, he needed to act on it.. keeping the advice that the elder mech had given him in mind. It was a terrifying thought, and he was even more afraid of telling the Wrecker how he felt to begin with. What if he really didn't feel the same way?
"You.. really think so? I want to say something, but I've been afraid to."
Pharma gave a small flick of his wings. "I'm not saying it because I'm obligated to. I'm saying it because I want to. Because I mean it." His optics were soft, with a bit of a hidden sadness behind them. He never was the type to let a hidden emotion show, feeling the need to control what he showed. It had been that which kept the Decepticon Justice Division from seeing his weakness. Don't let them in, don't let them see. That was what had kept him from some of the worst of it.
Ratchet gave a good point. Ratchet wasn't the only medic anymore. Pharma too wasn't the only medic--alive--where he was anymore. "Neither of us are. And...it's refreshing to see...to see other medics again." His field however hard he tried, didn't conceal the sadness of that statement like Pharma's words had. It would be hard to get him to admit that he'd seen so many medics who had been slaughtered by those monsters.
"Aha! Has he also been the one blasting behind enemy supply lines to make sure we...we can actually survive?" That made his spark leap somewhat. "I hear Wreckers are keepers if you can capture their sparks. That's mostly a rumor, haven't heard it from any personal experience." He had such a casual tone about it, though he meant that he believed Ratchet should definitely keep Wheeljack.
"Oh, I know so. And...don't be afraid to open up. The worst he can say is that he'd rather just be friends or comrades. Don't make...the mistake I made with Cogwheel. Don't let the words remain unspoken."
That had been the best part about having another medic on the team. They could now split the work, but also be more productive at the same time. It wasn't all dumped on one bot, overstressing and overworking them to a breaking point. With another medic, Ratchet could get much needed rest.. not that he would easily allow himself to do so. He'd been at this for so long that it was all he really knew. Relaxing wasn't in the plans, even if Wheeljack was trying to ingrain that into him. "And now? I have you. That's.. the best thing I could have asked for."
The younger medic blinked in surprise, awed by Pharma's excitement when it came to their discussion about Wheeljack and his feelings for him. "That.. would be him, yes. He's determined to do everything to keep me.. us.. alive. He's been bringing us so much Energon, and I've never been sure how to properly thank him for it. It's incredibly dangerous what he does, but.." If that hadn't flustered him, the elder medic's next statement did. Wrecker's were.. keepers? "I.. suppose that if this somehow works out between me and him.. I could confirm that rumor for you."
Was that really the worst that could happen if he spoke of his feelings? He didn't want to be just friends though, but deep down he felt that maybe that's all they would be. "I want to tell Wheeljack.. I've just been afraid to and.. haven't found the right time to tell him. I want the timing to be right, but I'm still afraid that he won't feel the same way."
Pharma certainly did have a thing for Dr. Cogwheel. Ratchet had known a little about her, but he hadn't been in her class either. She taught the other group of students that had been at Messatine. "If.. you could do it all over again.. would you? Telling her, I mean."
Pharma gave a soft smile. His optics gave a soft look and he almost felt the sensation of tears for the first time in a long time. "The best thing both of us could have asked for." He started trembling and tears slipped down his face through the smile.
Pharma felt his spark lifting. "I...I wouldn't know how to thank him either. All I know is that...I trust him with you. I dearly trust him with you." He then swallowed hard. "I hope it is confirmed."
Pharma swallowed hard. It was rich really. He was advising someone to admit their feelings. But he had been too much of a coward to admit his own. He seemed to hide his hands in his lap while he fidgeted them, trying not to let Ratchet see. "If you worry about the 'right' timing, the 'right' place, you'll never see it in the moment. Take it from someone who worried about those things...and never had the courage to speak his feelings."
He swallowed hard. "I'd have told her. I wouldn't have waited for the 'right time' or the 'right place'. I would have just told her. I wouldn't have been a coward."
Shoutbox
Please respect the space and don't hesitate to ask questions!
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Jun 14, 2023 22:40:34 GMT
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