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"Nooo..." Jazz whined in response to the question and tensed up in Prowl's lap as dead weight so that the tactician couldn't remove him.
Did he want to sit up? No, not really. He wanted to stay like this where it was just the two of them, their sparks singing to one another with shared emotions carrying between them as though a bonded pair. It was nice to imagine- to pretend that the two of them actually were bonded and that they no longer needed to have this strange conflicting bits of emotion between them. This was peaceful to him in a way that he didn't get to experience often and he was reluctant to lose it.
However, he figured that with Prowl being done cleaning out the various seams in his armor he would want to get up and go about his day. So, begrudgingly, Jazz slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position and sat on his knees facing Prowl. He just stared off briefly while his armor locked back up and closed off seams. Once everything was clicked into place and secure, Jazz turned his helm to the side and looked around the room. It was so empty here. There was not a single thing out of place even though there was nothing around TO be as such. Nothing hung on the wall, no decor was scattered about. It was barren... at least in comparison to what Jazz's quarters looked like. Jazz really hadn't ever taken the time to look in here since he didn't get more than a moment or two opportunity to be around and usually that was just him being focused on getting Prowl situated in his berth.
Now he just sat, shifting his legs around so that his pedes were on the floor again and he lay slouched against the back of the couch. His knee still felt a little weird, but at least everything else seemed to be in working order.
"Sorry for layin' everythin' so heavy on ya, man..."
"Don't apologize." He tipped his helm so that he could watch Jazz as the other looked around the room. "It is...admirable, being able to express yourself and your emotions so clearly. I only wish I were able to do the same." Prowl knew he lacked in social graces, and any sort of relationship was going to flounder due to this. He vented softly, shifting where he sat so that he could rest his doorwings against the back of the couch where they were out of the way but not being smooshed.
"I enjoy your company very much Jazz. I will consider everything you said to me. All I ask for is your patience and some time." He was looking straight ahead again, trying to find the words to make this right. Jazz had told him he wanted to bond with him, to be his sparkmate. But...with the war still in full swing that was the last thing he wanted.
Still, he hated to leave things this way, with them both so confused and Jazz's feelings hurt. So he pushed out of his comfort zone and reached a hand out to snag the other mech's hand, gaze still focused forward so that he didn't retreat from the action. "I haven't recharged that well in a very long time, and I have you to thank for that. I would be...amiable, to having you stay over with me again, if you like. Perhaps in a way we would both be comfortable enough to recharge this time." He rubbed his thumb against Jazz's palm, finally tipping his head just enough to look at the other.
"I don't want what happened to damage what we already have. Both professionally and personally, but I am not ready at this time to press any further. As I said, give me time, I'll find you when I've had time to process it all."
There Prowl went with that 'patience' thing again. The last thing he was able to do was be patient! He HATED that word. If he didn't hear it so much from everyone- especially Prowl, usually when he was scolding him for being too off-the-wall- he would assume that the word just didn't exist. The more that the tactician said it the more he could feel himself sulking which could have been noticed by the visible slump in his shoulders as each second passed between them. Rather, the more that Prowl talked.
He was about ready to call this quits, to tell Prowl to just forget that he had ever said anything. It didn't change his feelings about it, as he just wanted to brush it off as 'I never said that, just forget it' just so he didn't have to hear Prowl go on and on about it. That, and Jazz was only feeling worse about everything. He had come out with it so strongly that it had pretty much crashed his partner's processor! How was he supposed to take that? He was responsible for a terrible thing. Harming Prowl in any way was unacceptable to him.
Then there was contact. Jazz's thoughts stopped right then and there and he looked at the grasp Prowl had on his servo. The tactician was still speaking and Jazz looked from their servos to him, then back again as he rubbed his palm with his thumb. Though he wasn't unfamiliar with this sort of contact with Prowl, it was usually Jazz who was initiating it. The fact that he had done it on his own? And so firmly as well? Considering what had just been said? The saboteur almost thought it was a trick; that he was dreaming and would wake up from it to find that the two were still in recharge or something.
But no, he was definitely awake. A quick scan told him that much.
Jazz made optic contact with Prowl and sat there in silence, just staring at his partner for what seemed like forever when it really hadn't. When he finally spoke it was started off with a soft vent and a nod, after which he returned the hold and closed his digits tightly around Prowl's thumb as though wanting to keep the physical contact he was being given.
"I... yeah. I would like that." Jazz smiled a little. "Rechargin' with ya, that is. Though maybe we can trade off what quarters we stay in?" Something about the sparse room of his tactician partner made him uneasy. Reminded him of a prison cell. Not that he would say it out loud. "And don't worry. I ain't so shallow that I'd expect a 'here and now' answer. Take your time. I'll wait for your answer and accept whatever ya give me."
His attention shifted to the hand he was holding, his thumb still moving in an absent motion back and forth across the back. At least he seemed to have done right this time, taking the other by the hand. He hadn't been sure if it was a good idea, and hoped Jazz understood how hard this was for him. He tried so hard on behalf of his partner. Hopefully said partner appreciated it.
"That would be fine." He locked blue optics on his shorter companion, offering a very slight smile despite everything. "I am rarely in my quarters, as you can probably tell." He knew it looked like he'd just moved into the room, or that no one lived there at all. He was just so busy all the time that it hadn't occurred to him to personalize the place. He did have one item that was personal to him; a picture of the senior most members of the Autobot army standing in front of the Outpost when it was first completed. He didn't remember when the picture was taken, but he hadn't removed it.
"I'm glad you understand. Perhaps I'll have something to tell you after I've been to see Ratchet." Which he did remember he'd promised to do. "In the meantime I am not due on duty today, so if you aren't busy I would...appreciate spending some time with you. Or...just not ending the time we have already spent just yet."
Jazz was enjoying the touch of his partner, even if it was just slight. The fact that it was something and he wasn't the one who had started it? That screamed out 'I care for you' more than anything else did. Now, that didn't meant that Jazz was gonna hang up his flirty nature with those around him, at least not until Prowl gave him a definite answer. Because, unfortunately, Jazz was a very sensitive and demanding mech.
There was the next request from Prowl that made Jazz's faceplate warm up and his mouth pretty much hung there open in shock. Prowl wanted to? Was he really? Well now.
"Ya... wanna spend the day with me?"
He hadn't expected that the tactician would actually want to spend more time than necessary with him. Considering they had spent all this time in recharge together, he had almost been certain that Prowl would have been telling him to leave. Instead it was the opposite. Although it was completely unexpected to Jazz, it did not go without saying that it did touch his spark a great deal. Prowl wanted him to stay with him, to be as a constant presence with him for now. Prowl was warming up to him! Or at least he would have liked to think that. Though it had to be true or else he really would have been tossed out on his aft by now.
"Uh... yeah. Yeah, I'd like that a lot. Ain't like we spend any time together outside of meetin's or mission talk." The saboteur smiled wide then shifted some so he could lay on his back with his helm in Prowl's lap. He didn't dare let go of his servo and he stared up at his partner. "So. What do ya feel like doin'? I mean, we can stay in here and just talk or stare at the wall if ya wanna and I'd be fine with it. Really. Cause I'd be with you so it don't matter what we do."
The tactician ducked his head, doorwings still drooped over the back of the couch. He felt his faceplates heat in embarrassment, and he could only nod. "If you have other plans I completely understand. I was simply offering it as an option if you chose to spend the day with me. You are under no obligation to do so if you don't want to." And good Primus he was rambling. "I'm going to stop speaking now."
His head dropped, not looking at the other for the longest time.
But then Jazz said he wanted to spend time with him and he looked at him, doorwings actually perking up slightly in a show of happiness. He didn't control the appendages nearly as well when it was just him and Jazz, saw no reason to when they weren't in public. The shift of the other to lying with his helm in his lap startled the larger mech, and for a moment all he could do was stare down at Jazz with a bemused expression.
"I'm afraid my knowledge ends here. What does one do with a companion when not on duty?" He really didn't know, and hoped Jazz would lead the way.
"Uh. Well..." Jazz realized just how confusing this must have been to his partner. They were often working together in the war effort, but as far as spending 'quality' time? That was new for the both of them! Well. As much as Jazz had always wanted this it seemed that now that he had gotten it? He didn't really know how to take it. Separated the two comrades had different interests and means in which to settle their unease. For Jazz? When there was nothing else to do and he was feeling particularly needy he sought comfort in the arms of other mechs. Prowl? He was probably reading through datapads or something like that.
At least he had never jumped Prowl, cause that definitely would have made their partnership awkward. Jazz was more than active but Prowl? Seemed the tactician was more of a dead weight when it came to that sort of stuff.
"There ain't a list of 'you have to do this and that when you're alone with your special someone' rules, Prowl. Ya just gotta find somethin' the two of ya enjoy doin' and do it together. I mean, I hate layin' around doin' nothin' but I could really use the off time if ya wanted to just lounge here some. Fine by me. Or if ya got somethin' ya wanted to get done and I could come with. I mean, there are other things outside of base we could do. A drive in movie, watchin' the sunset... or sunrise. I dunno what time it is, uhh. Well, why don't we just leave it to you? You're the one who's gotta do the major relaxin' after all that tense stuff ya got goin' on in your processor and frame so I want it ta be somethin' that can keep ya calm."
His bemused expression held while Jazz ranted, deciding that seeing his usually confident partner this way was a good thing. It had always been that way. He couldn't recall a time when Jazz had ever been unsure or uneasy about something. Not professionally anyway. It made him feel better to know the other was as clueless as he was with this matter. So, perhaps there was common ground in that? It was a start, since he had no idea what Jazz did in his leisure time.
He waited for Jazz to stop talking then went with the first thing that popped into his processors. Jazz was his 'special someone' as the other had put it to him just now, and it seemed to be the best option to his still over active processors. So he moved his hands, one to rest against the side of Jazz's face, and the other to search around the couch they were sitting on for one of Jazz's hands. Some part of him wanted to lay the others hand over his chassis, to see if it made the stinging of his spark go away like it had before.
When Jazz rambled it was a sign of his unease, though it was usually unable to be noticed since the mech did nothing BUT talk. Senselessness, however? That was the sure sign. Prowl was probably the only one who could tell the difference between it, but it was so rare to see Jazz in such a state that perhaps he wouldn't. Now that he was done going on and on, Jazz was about to sit up. Right away he was caught by the actions of the other that kept him where he lay, though, and instead he just stared up at Prowl in mild confusion. The servos that were touching him felt so delicate with how they just lay upon him without any true intent behind them.
What would Jazz do? Did he dare move? Would it ruin the moment between them again? He had already messed up so many times so far that he was almost afraid to make any move at all. There was just a part of him that wanted to and, frankly, he couldn't help himself. So without any words Jazz turned his servo slightly- just enough so that he could lightly hold onto the tips of Prowl's digits. Then he nuzzled his helm into the other one and his engine rumbled softly in his chassis in approval.
Jazz had so many things he wished he could tell him, but he had promised to give his partner time. As difficult as that would be for him? It had been so long that he had known the tactician that a bit more time probably wasn't going to hurt.
... Even though now that they had become so much closer, perhaps it would.
He felt a true smile pulling at him, and allowed it to show on his face despite how stoic he usually kept himself. This was okay. It was simple, and nothing was protesting, so he'd stay this way for a little while. Experimenting in the land of social interactions was precarious at best, and he had only Jazz to go by how he was doing. At least with his partner if he did something wrong the other would simply tell him rather than making a big deal out of it. Few actually understood how underdeveloped his social abilities were.
Prowl's helm tipped slightly, and he had no idea he was giving the other a 'am I doing good?' look at the moment. Because he wondered and when he was this comfortable with someone his thoughts often showed on his face. Plus his spark was talking to him again, confused and wondering the same thing as he was. He didn't want to mess this up. At least with how Jazz was treating it he hadn't done wrong yet. That was good.
The tactician's doorwings angled into a neutral position finally, and he palmed his hand more so that it was spread against the other's face where he nuzzled into it. He didn't pull away, just watched. Just learned. When he felt the others fingers brush his own he latched on to that hand and drew it up. Just as he'd thought he would he laid the others hand against his chassis, linking their digits so that his hand was over Jazz's and they both had it lain over the place under which is spark rested.
Said spark sang a little and purred, telling Jazz's how happy it was with just this simple contact.
Prowl moved and right away Jazz felt his spark skip. Had he done something wrong? Did he need to pull back? Was Prowl going to overwhelm himself again? All these thoughts were going through Jazz's processor as he started to feel a slight bit of panic come to the surface. What could he do to stop it from ending?
It didn't. Instead he was greeted by a smile from his partner, something that was just as rare for him to see as Jazz's panic was for his partner to be witness to. He returned it with a half one of his own, a silent indication that he was happy. Something about that smile he was given made him feel warm and... oddly at ease. Not that he wasn't always in such a relaxing state with his partner around, but this was just a bit different. At least to him it was. It was special.
The further actions proved to be just as much. The way Prowl watched him told him that he was trying to read into things, study his movements as though looking for signs of approval or otherwise. So Jazz would play into it. When his digits spread he nuzzled into it more and purred again, giving a small kiss to his pinky. It was affectionate but not over the top, and barely enough of contact to be anything more than a light brush. When Jazz's servo was brought to Prowl's chassis, however? That did startle him but he refused to show it, reminding himself of the study he was under. When he heard the spark singing to him Jazz's own reciprocated the tones and sang back to him, which widened Jazz's smile. His thumb moved in a small circle pattern over where his servo was held, providing Prowl with another very light sign of affection.
The saboteur couldn't help but want to be closer, even though he knew he couldn't' go too far. So he just turned slightly in Prowl's lap, laying somewhat on his side so he could be angled enough to stare right up at him. His knees came up a bit, almost as though Jazz were trying to curl up around Prowl. It wasn't an action that could be completed considering the lack of space on the couch, but it still gave him a way to feel a little nearer to the tactician.
He wasn't really sure how to take Jazz's light affection, but it didn't bother him so he allowed it. He hoped these little allowances showed Jazz that he really was thinking on everything the other had said to him about his feelings. He wasn't ready to make a choice one way or the other, but this wasn't a bad way to spend his day off. Not by a long shot.
Prowl actually flinched when Jazz moved, though it was due to surprise rather than the other bothering him. He wasn't sure what to make of the others movement, so he watched and tried his best to figure it out. He was used to figuring out battles with hundreds involved, and yet he couldn't figure out the motives and actions of the one closest to him. It was baffling.
He moved his hand then, hesitating with it hovering over Jazz's frame for the longest time as he tried to decide what to do before simply laying it on the others shoulder so that he could rub at the area absently.
Jazz's visor flashed a couple of times and he continued to smile up at Prowl in spite of his other servo having moved to his shoulder. He wished that it hadn't, but what was he going to really do about it? There was no way he was going to be the one placing Prowl's servos here and there, especially since they were doing so well right now. He hummed a bit, a clear sign that he was happy since he never sing or hum otherwise.
Though even if Prowl was having problems figuring out Jazz's actions since he was hesitant to do anything unless the tactician initiated it first, Jazz's spark was the direct opposite. Now that Prowl was so close and not pulling away and allowing for his spark to sing again, Jazz's echoed the song. It was louder now, able to be heard outside of their chassis as his called out to the other's in some sort of strange way of trying to coax the other to increase the volume as well.
The light on the visor dimmed some. The saboteur was still tired, having not bothered to recharge since Prowl had first woke him up from the little he had gotten. It was catching up to him though he did his best to fight off the urge to recharge. He didn't want to miss a moment of this.
His engine rumbled lowly, though being as perspective as he was he noticed that his partner was drifting. Jazz's spark was singing to his own, but the spy was tired. He could almost feel it, the sensation crawling through his frame as if it were his own. It was peculiur, but he didn't let it distract him for long.
Prowl let the moment linger, let the silence expand. Most importantly, he kept Jazz's hand pressed to his chassis and hummed softly, encouraging the other to rest without saying so. If he said something Jazz would fight him on it. He knew the other far too well to believe otherwise.
His free hand, after a little thought, moved so that he could palm the side of Jazz's face once more, rubbing his fingers along the others face and jaw, back and forth in a slow, soft movement. He hoped it was soothing.
Every part of him was in some sort of fight. He wanted to rest but he didn't want to miss out on this opportunity with Prowl. The fact that the tactician wanted to spend the time with him- alone- made his spark flutter. To waste it in recharge? No way! No how!
And yet, if he had been able to slip into it when Prowl had then perhaps he wouldn't have the issue he did now. His frame felt heavier than normal, but not because of illness or something the matter. Instead it was out of his sheer exhaustion and Prowl using that stupid soothing touch of his to convince him to be lulled off. With a heavy vent he rolled onto his side, facing Prowl, and pulled his knees in as close as he could so he could curl up. Fine. If he was going to recharge? He would do it the way he wanted to.
"Hn... Prowl?" Jazz turned his head to look up to the tactician, though only just slightly. His helm felt heavy. Clearly he wasn't going to be awake for much longer. "The humans got a lil' sayin'. Maybe one day..." he paused to return his helm back to how it had been and shifted some so he could curl in closer to Prowl, nuzzling his helm into Prowl's midsection. "... I'll get ta say it to ya..."
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