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Characters: @ironhide Location: Jasper Desert Content Warnings: N/A Plot Summary: So like, while on some stupid nature hike, Brit like, totally runs into giant robots - OMG. Oh yeah, and she meets a truck too.
Brit hated most school activities, and nature hikes were one of them.
So here she was, walking on the so-called “nature hike” - or what was supposed to be one. She’d decided about ten minutes in she was bored and went in search of cell reception off the hiking trail. This was, in effect, a hard thing to do since reception apparently sucked in the desert. So there she was, dolled out in her flashy clothes and holding it up to the sun. One bar. No bars. Half a bar. No bads again.
God, why did life always make things so difficult?
She’d been walking for a while when she came across the dark shadow. She squinted her eyes and looked up to see something huge standing there. What the hell was this, a rock? “Seriously!? Can this day get any worse!!?” She stamped her foot slightly. “Come on!!!”
That’s when the thing turned its head.
Wait it had a head? Brit backed up slightly as what she would soon know as a Vehicon, our doing who knows what turned to face. Holy frick that was a huge robot. What the heck was a huge robot doing in Jasper!? “Ummm excuse me, but what the fresh hell are you?” She asked rather bluntly of the vehicon. “And you’re blocking my sun, so can you like, move?”
The vehicon stood there a second and then fired a shot. Brit of course screamed and began to sprint, clearly not happy with this situation. All she wanted was her cell service dangit!
Ironhide heard the shot and knew he'd found his quarry. A savage smile lit his face as he charged through the rock formations of the desert, toward the elusive Vehicon. There'd been five of the buggers when they jumped him. Now, there was just one, trying to slink about and get the drop on him.
He rounded the corner, moving surprisingly quickly for his size, plasma canon whirring and pulsing blue at the center. His optics lit up when he spotted the Vehicon. It seemed to have been preoccupied with a human, walking slowly after the girl(?) (he wasn't too sure about how to tell 'em apart yet). It's red-visored helm whipped around when it heard him coming.
"Decepticon punk!" he fired, "Try this one!"
The Vehicon scrambled to dodge, moving enough that the shot only hit its shoulder. Still, it made a pained sound, a smoldering hole in the joint.
"I won't miss again, ya' slagheap!"
Hopefully, the human would have enough sense to steer clear of the fight. He wasn't keen on accidentally harming 'em.
Brit could feel herself panicking a bit. But the first thing that was on her mind? Grabbing her cell phone. She needed photographic evidence of what was happening to warn the world.
Then she heard the gruff voice.
She turned around just as the Vehicon was reoiling from the blast. Whoa, that one was huge. Brit could hardly believe her eyes, had that red one just come to her defense? She scrambled to hit the record button, beginning to record the fight that was happening. What were these? Alien invaders? A government experiment gone wrong? She moved behind a rock as she continued to record.
“Holy crap! Gonna release this to YouTube later! OMG! Are you seeing this? Is this really happening!?” She shrieked, probably a bit dramatic, but oh well. “I think that red one just saved my life! But more importantly... I think that other one made me break a nail! Oh my god. If this is the end I just want my 15k subscribers list to know... Yes I am single, and no I will not date you. Seriously, get lives, get out of the basement!”
She screamed as she heard the vehicon firing. “Oh god, I’m too young, hot, and smart to die! Goodbye cruel world!”
The Vehicon's shot connected with the Autobot warrior. But, his reinforced armor was far too much for a generic weapon like this one. His grizzled faceplates pulled into a smirk as he fired again, blowing his opponent's helm off. The footsoldier stood for a moment, headless, before pitching to the side with a thud.
Ironhide powered down his canons, satisfied.
"Must'a been gettin' awfully comfy 'round here if ya' forget about me, 'Cons."
He gave the husk a kick as he passed, just for good measure. Then, his optics flickered about, searching for the human who had fled. Had they gotten away? Eh, that wouldn't be good. They were supposed to be keepin' a low profile...
"Hey, uh, girl," yeah, that was the term, "You still there? It should be safe for ya' now..."
He, of course, did not realize what his being a very large alien robot with equally large canons may do for a human's anxiety levels.
Holy crap he’d just decapitated that other robot. What the heck was going on? What just happened? And was he now talking to her? Did she respond? And more importantly if this was an alien and she were making first contact, did her hair look OK? Of course, now that the shock was done she was starting to see just how awesome this was. Maybe she was and she could be famous for being the first to make contact.
And so, surprisingly without fear now she came out of her hiding spot.
“Ho-lyyyyyy crapppp. What are you? Are you like an alien? Oh my god! This is totally insane! Wave hi to the camera! I am totally going to getting to a million subscribers with this!” She then added rather exuberantly. “Hashtag that day I was almost killed by giant robots. We’re going to be internet famous which is super close to actual famous.”
Ironhide looked down at the small alien creature in surprise. Oh. He hadn't expected this kind of...enthusiasm. He'd been told that humans would be terrified of him and that he should try to avoid showing himself as much as possible. Well...scrap.
"Uhhhh..."
The old warrior stood for a moment, taken off-guard by the flurry of questions and nonsensical words. Two that did stand out were 'camera' and 'internet'.
Double scrap. Chromia was gonna kick his aft for getting himself seen like this.
Fortunately, Ironhide was old enough to be a little crafty. When you couldn't shoot your way out of something, you could think your way out. He could fix this. He hoped. Thinking wasn't really his strong suit.
Carefully, he knelt down.
"Ah, I'm an Autobot," he paused, observing her, "What's that you got there? Some kind of human technology? Can I see it?" he extended a servo, slowly and without drawing too near so as not to scare her.
Brit looked at him an Auto... Bot? What kind of a name was that?
Wait hold the phone! Literally. Had this alien just asked to see her phone? As if! Without warning she slipped it into her pocket. First of all - that was the oldest trick in the book. You wanted something gone? Great. Just trick the person into handing it over. Clearly this mech had just gone and stereotyped her as your typical dumb blonde teenager. And Brit was anything but.
Besides she now doubted this was an alien. If anything that name sounded foreign.
So with a smug, almost impish grin she said. “How about no? You could crush this thing without even thinking. And if you think I’m going to just stand here in the middle of the desert looking like and idiot and without Twitter... Well then, you sir, are sorely mistaken,” she added with a quip, pointing at him. “Besides this phone is limited edition it isn’t even out for another two months. I had to bribe Apple to give it to me. So if it’s broken, mister Autobot, you’re going to be broken!”
She then added rather bluntly. “Buuuuuuttttt I won’t post it online if you want. As long as you can tell me where I can buy one of you,” She then added with a bit of naiivity. “Autobots that sounds Japanese. Who makes you? I can pay whatever they want... Then they can have their video back.”
Ironhide cocked his head slightly when the device disappeared. Huh. Humans were smarter than he thought. She was certainly a spunky little thing. Reminded him a little bit of Chromia...just more mouthy. She was actually threatening him. He couldn't help but eye her a little dubiously. He'd seen some little bots who could throw down, but, she didn't seem to have any compartments for hidden weapons...and she was a tiny little thing. Nah, not a physical threat at the moment, despite her words.
The biggest threat she presented was what she had seen and recorded.
The human offered her deal...and Ironhide immediately frowned. It was a frightening expression, to those who didn't know him. Scarred faceplates folded and hardened thoughtfully. It was all too similar to the face he made when blasting somebot a new tailpipe. But, it was an expression of confusion more than anything else.
"Ya' wanna buy an Autobot?" he asked, dumbfounded, "We ain't for sale. We're soldiers, not buy-mechs. And I ain't no Cold Construct. I'm a true, old Forged bot..."
He considered her for a moment. Then, it hit him. Ohhhh. She thought he was some human creation. He snorted a laugh.
"There ain't no way a human could build an Autobot. Or a Decepticon, either. Way too advanced for 'em. After all, we ain't from these parts."
He folded his arms over his chassis, massive canons and all.
"...What's yer name?" Ironhide asked, peering down at her.
Brittany gasped. If humans couldn’t make it there was only one explanation...
So it was an alien! Holy crap, a real live alien! Oh wow, now she did understand why he wanted her to delete the video. If this were an alien - and she revealed it on YouTube she could get famous. But there was that other robot that had tried to attack her. “Oh oh wow you’re an actual alien. Ok cool. Sorry I didn’t think... I mean, I got so excited about getting internet famous I didn’t really think it through,” she explained honestly. “Though I gotta ask why you’re keeping it a secret. You guys, would be like superheroes or something. I mean you already saved a beautiful damsel - you’re halfway there!”
She looked at him as he asked for her name. In the meantime taking out her phone and already starting to delete the video. God this sucked! An actual, real life alien and she couldn’t even tell the world! Life was so unfair honestly. “Brittany Princess Mony. But everyone who actually knows me calls me Brit. Brittany reminds me of that stupid Glee character and ew.” She added dramatically.
She then added. “Have you got a name or is like... So complicated that I couldn’t understand? Because I always wondered what an alien language would even sound like!”
Ironhide's faceplates shifted into another frown. This human was awfully jabbery. And he didn't understand about half of what she said. Still...he was relieved when he peered down and saw her deleting the video she'd captured. Good. At least that was done...
Now to deal with her.
He shrugged in response to her question.
"Boss's orders. I don't question 'em. But, I figure it's so we don't go scarin' people. If y'all knew 'bout us, there's no tellin' what would happen. Some of ya might melt us down or drag us off to dissect us. Others might be scared and attack us. Or think we're gonna attack them. Better to just play it safe."
He cocked his head at her, still frowning. A weld mark across his optic pulled that eye a bit narrower than the other, a small incongruence that showcased just how old he was.
"So ya like to be called Brit? Alright," he nodded once.
He could do that.
"My name's Ironhide. I suppose if I said it in Cybertronian, ya wouldn't understand, but, that's the English translation. My friends from home call me-," he produced a series of deep, grinding, mechanical noises.
Cybertronian was not a pretty language by any means. It was, like its people, mechanical and utterly unlike anything on Earth.
Ok that did make a fair amount of sense. A lot of people would freak out - want to attack or conduct experiments on them the second they found out about any kind of alien. So she figured that the mech probably had a fair and true point, at the very least. “Well you don’t have to worry about that from me. Attacking you would be messy, I could break a nail,” she added dramatically. “Not that I usually care but these cost me four hundred dollars. They’re made from real shredded down gold!”
She showed the golden nails - just for emphasis.
She listened to the mech attempt to say its name in his own language and covered her ears. God, that was one sound she really never wanted to hear again - like ever. “Alright, Ironhide then. Easy to remember. Totally weird name though. Like, ever heard of something more easy? Like Joe or Frank?” She asked rather stupidly.
Ironhide honestly didn't understand what the human girl would want with gold nails. Gold was soft and pliable. Didn't hold up well in battle. But, he got the impression that most humans didn't do a lot of fighting. Was it for decoration, then? Why gold? Why not something tough and far more valuable, like iron glass? Especially if she was worried about breaking them?
Humans were strange.
Still, her reaction to their language was somewhat amusing.
"Easy? Ya want somethin' short, ya gotta talk to Kup. He's even older than I am," he smiled, as though he found something about this individual particularly amusing, "Meaner, too."
He paused for a moment, a thought occurring to him. From what he'd seen thus far, humans tended to wander in pairs or small packs. A lone one wasn't rare but, it wasn't exactly common so far out from one of their towns.
"Speakin' of easy, ya made yerself a nice target, wanderin' alone like that. Dontcha' have a unit or somethin'? 'Cons're less likely to attack groups. Attracts too much attention."
Ok this guy was a little on the weird side, but she oddly liked him. Maybe because he had a lack of filter so far. She rarely had a filter herself and liked being around like minded people like her.
Go figure she would feel that way about a giant robot... With cannons on his arms. God this really was weird. At his mention of this Kup she put her hands on her hips. “Well I can’t imagine how old that would, like, be,” Brit replied honestly. “I’m gonna say given you’re a robot of some sort you must live like centuries. If not forever.”
Oh yeah, the group. Brit grimaced a little at that - her teacher was probably flipping the heck out right about now. Or not, since this wasn’t his first rodeo going out anywhere with Brit so... “I mean I was with my school technically. But I didn’t have good enough cell coverage!” She explained. “I took like a hundred selfies and none of them have gone through! So I ran into that... Whatever it was.”
She then added. “By the way, since I’ve seen you do you now like have to kill me? Because that would be totally not cool.”
Shoutbox
Please respect the space and don't hesitate to ask questions!
altria : please dont be dead?
Jun 14, 2023 22:40:34 GMT
Partia: Is this still alive?
Dec 17, 2022 6:02:02 GMT
Partia: Is this still alive?
Dec 17, 2022 6:01:34 GMT