fooled around (text)

[Ratchet]

    To:  @wheeljack

Perhaps, but he's been through a lot.. though he won't tell me what exactly.


I don't want to ask him just yet.  I want him to come to me when he's ready.

    To:  Wheeljack

This goes for you as well.  I won't press you about anything you don't want to talk about.

    To:  Wheeljack

You're sure?  You do so much for us, and I would like to return the favor one of these days.

Seeing Wheeljack's next message nearly caused his spark to come to a complete stop.  That was never a good start to any conversation, and it only left him anxious.  Just what was it he'd wanted to talk about?  Had he finally caught on that the 'friend' he'd been talking about earlier was actually the medic himself?  He could only release a sigh of relief when it'd been a request to look up a show.  He did so, confused by the fact that all of these people were singing and dancing.  Interesting..

    To:  Wheeljack

I wouldn't say this is something I would normally watch, but I'm willing to give it a chance.

[Deleted]

   To: Ratchet

all joking aside, its best to leave him be till he comes to you. dunno what happened to him but i dont think it was good. he'll talk when hes ready

    To: Ratchet

thanks for the offer, doc. dunno if ill take you up on it but. i appreciate it

    To: Ratchet

you return the favor by textin back at 2am. dont worry bout it (tho if you have high grade somewhere in that base i wouldnt say no)

How was it that he could face legions of Decepticons without a fear and yet the very simple concept of asking Ratchet about his feelings towards him and telling the medic how he felt had him cringing?

   NOT SENT: To: Ratchet

oh by the way i think i love you but im a coward and i cant say it

Even typing out the message had his spark freezing over in fear. Ugh. 'Yeah, nope, play it safe, use a distraction.' 

    To: Ratchet

your nurse darby suggested it? idk, theatre was never my thing, but ill give it a go if you want to 

[Ratchet]

    To:  @wheeljack

From everything I know, it was quite unpleasant.  Whatever happened, he was concerned for my safety.


That's why he cut communications with me from what he told me.  Pharma did it to protect me.  He feared that if I found out and went running to Messatine, I would have been killed.

    To:  Wheeljack

I might have a couple of cubes of high grade in my personal stash.  Haven't used them for anything, so why not?

    To:  Wheeljack

Why am I not surprised that she did?  I suppose we can watch it for ourselves when you next visit.

    To:  Wheeljack

If you feel you need to recharge, don't let me stop you.  Unless that 'rush' of yours is still keeping you awake.

[Deleted]

   To: Ratchet

he must care for you alot. i dunno what happened there but it probably wasnt good. probably a good thing you didnt go runnin off there

    NOT SENT: To: Ratchet

im gonna hold you to it, doc. its a date!

    To: Ratchet

im gonna hold you to it, doc. its a plan!

    To: Ratchet

you sayin you want me to knock it off and let you recharge? (jk)

i am feelin kinda tired now, the rush wore off finally. might just go to sleep now, yeah. what about you?

[Ratchet]

    To:  @wheeljack

He does, and I care about him very much.

Not in a romantic way, mind you.  He's more like a creator to me, even if he isn't really my creator.

Like the Pit was he going to freely admit that he came from the Well!

    To:  Wheeljack

Very well.  I shall have the high grade prepared for you upon your arrival.

    To:  Wheeljack

That's not what I meant.  I just wanted to be sure that I was not keeping you from recharge if you were growing tired.

Oh.  You were just kidding.

    To:  Wheeljack

I myself should probably try to get some rest.  I won't be of much use in the medical bay if I can't recharge.

If you are going to recharge, sleep well.

[Deleted]

   To: Ratchet

i dont wanna be keepin you from recharge either, sunshine

    To: Ratchet

we should both be gettin to berth then. i should be by in the next few days or so, so make sure that high grade is ready

    To: Ratchet

happy dreams, doc. get rested up. dont wanna be fallin asleep in medbay, now, do ya?

With a smile, a shake of his head, and a sigh that he would absolutely not admit was fond, Wheeljack set aside his battered datapad. 'Schoolbot crush', he reminded himself, as if he hadn't just spent half the night texting Ratchet because he couldn't sleep. 'Just a schoolbot crush.' 

The Wrecker drifted off soon after.

. . .

[ 05:35 LOCAL TIME ]

   NOT SENT: To: Ratchet 

oh by the way i think i love you but im a coward and i cant say it

ERROR. SYSTEM MALFUNCTION. DATA DELETION INTERRUPTED.

REBOOTING. 3. 2. 1.

MESSAGE DELIVERED.

    To: Ratchet

oh by the way i think i love you but im a coward and i cant say it

[Ratchet]

    To:  @wheeljack

Rest well and take care, Wheeljack.

    To:  Wheeljack

And stay safe!  Feel free to message me further if you feel the need.

    
Ratchet set down his datapad, attempting to get some recharge.  He'd been fairly successful, but it had still been a loss either way given he'd only gotten a few hours of recharge.  Nowhere near what would have been considered a good night's rest.  Once he'd awoken, he picked up his datapad to check any missed messages that might have filtered in while he was asleep.

Oh!  It would seem that Wheeljack had messaged him back and..

He swore he could feel his spark stop as he read those words.  He.. loved him..?  What had started as initial joy that Wheeljack had felt the same way as he'd felt towards him suddenly came to an abrupt halt, worry suddenly sinking in.  Why would he have sent a message like that in the middle of the night long after they said they were going to sleep.  The medic looked at the datapad sadly, setting it aside.  "...Clearly that message was meant for someone else..  Why would he ever feel that way towards someone like me?  I should just get this out of my head right now.. before it hurts me that much more."

But should he message him back..?

[Deleted]

Unlike Ratchet, Wheeljack did not have a schedule set in stone and slept long into the morning to make up for the late-night texting. Also unlike Ratchet, the Wrecker did not think to check his own datapad in when he did get up (or, specifically, the sent messages) apart from a quick cursory glance before he went off to raid and blow yet another energon mine. 

It wasn't until later that he realized his folly. 

. . .

   To: Ratchet

hey sunshine lookit what i got upto on todays mission!

    To: Ratchet

    To: Ratchet

   To: Ratchet

dont worry tho apart from that it was business as usual

Fresh from the field riding on a victorious high, Wheeljack finally took a moment check over his messages. His spark nearly stuttered to a stop once he saw the last message he'd sent last night -- or, rather, the message that had been sent on its own. He had been sure he'd deleted it! Horrified, he checked a third time to see if there were any replies after his own from Ratchet, and wasn't sure whether he should be relieved or terrified when he saw there were none.

Maybe... Ratchet hadn't seen it? Maybe this was just a glitch. Or maybe Ratchet had, but was ignoring it. Should he play it cool and pretend nothing happened? Frag, had he just blown what little chance he had? The Wrecker groaned, pressing a hand to his face, thinking hard on what to do. 

    To: Ratchet 

so you get any weird messages lately?

[Ratchet]

It was as Ratchet worked in the medical bay that he noticed a couple of messages had popped up on his datapad that he had set aside. Pharma had stepped out for the moment, so he seized the opportunity to check it. Much to his surprise.. it had been from Wheeljack.

And there had been no mention of that message from last night. Instead.. a couple of selfies that had made him chuckle a little, although with a somewhat sad tone to it.

    To:  @wheeljack

You better not have been hurt.

When he didn't get a response right away, that's when he grew concerned, but that concern only grew when he received the next message.

    To:  Wheeljack

I think I did actually, and I have something I need to ask you.


Wheeljack.. How do you feel about me?  Please, be honest.

[Deleted]

Wheeljack's spark pounded in his spark casing as he waited for a reply, wondering if he'd made a mistake. Perhaps it had only been a glitch, and the message hadn't sent... but then again, he had to know if he'd just fragged up another friendship by making things awkward. Finally, his datapad dinged, and he read the text with equal amounts excitement and dread.

Ratchet had seen the message.

'Aw, scrap, what am I supposed t'do now?!' He had never in his life been paralyzed with indecision... and yet here he was now, sitting hunched over his datapad and staring at the message from Ratchet as if it were written in another language. Could he ignore it? Brush it off as a joke? No, he couldn't do either of those things to the other bot, 'cause that would be unfair. Wheeljack swallowed hard. How was it that one feisty Autobot doctor had done what countless Decepticons had failed to do, and had frozen him in his tracks?

Finally, he sent back a reply.

   To: Ratchet

im sorry, i didnt mean to make things weird. you dont. have to respond to that

    To: Ratchet

you can just ignore it i wont bring it up i swear

[Ratchet]

Ratchet stared down at Wheeljack's reply, frozen in the same sort of anxiety the Wrecker had felt. Scrap.. had he just made him feel bad? Had he come across as angry in his response? Scrap, scrap, scrap!  Now what was he supposed to do, let alone say?!

It wasn't even so much the fear that Wheeljack didn't feel the same way now.. but now it was also the fear that this was going to be the thing that killed their newfound friendship.

    To:  @wheeljack

No, Wheeljack.  I don't want to just not respond to it.


Look..


I'm sorry if I came across the wrong way.  I'm not angry with you.

    To:  Wheeljack

I don't want our friendship to die over this..  I truly don't.  I care deeply for you, even if

Ratchet had hit the send button before he even realized what it was he'd just typed out.  Once he had, he stared at his datapad with horror written all over his optics.  Horror, and a twinge of fear.  Oops.  He'd done it.  Told him how he felt.

[Deleted]

Wheeljack's audio sensors were ringing as gazed down in stunned silence at the message.  

Ratchet cared deeply for him.

Knowing this one simple little thing felt like being kicked in the chest, but in a 'not painful and terrifying but still exhilarating' way. His fear over angering the other bot somehow by his not-quite-deleted love message got put on the backburner (for Ratchet clearly didn't want their friendship to suffer for it, either) as he comprehended the possible implications of this... but caring deeply could mean anything. Still, one thing caught his attention.

   To: Ratchet

if what?

He waited a few more moments, before sending another message.

    To: Ratchet

... that bot you were talking about last night. were you talking about yourself?

[Ratchet]

'If what' had indeed been the question. Ratchet didn't know how to respond to that without giving himself way, staring at those words as if they'd just leapt off the datapad screen and directly at him. He could barely even get his digits to type, let alone move, and that's when the second message appeared.

Looked like there was nowhere to hide from this one. Wheeljack was catching on, and he couldn't just lie to him about it. That would only make everything worse.

    To:  @wheeljack

Not much point in hiding it any longer, is there.  You're right.  I was.

Like I had said.. it was because I was afraid that you didn't share the same feelings as I did.

He could feel his spark tensing up just sending that message alone, but it only felt tighter as he went on.

    To:  Wheeljack

That's why I wanted to know how you really felt about me.

I promise that I can handle it if you don't feel the same way..

[Deleted]

’I was afraid that you didn't share the same feelings as I did.’ Ratchet… had feelings for him? It was surreal in all the best ways! Still, it was a long time before Wheeljack managed to wrangle his thoughts together, so gobsmacked was he.

   To: Ratchet

this is kinda like rippin off a mesh bandage isnt it

His spark whirled anxiously in his spark casing as he typed in his next reply.

    To: Ratchet

i wasnt lying. i think i really do love you

    To: Ratchet

i wasnt sure if you felt the same way too tho, cos i didnt want to ruin this thing we have. dont wanna mess up a friendship

    To: Ratchet

hold on what the frag are we doin texting. im callin you

A few nanokliks later, Wheeljack pinged Ratchet’s personal comm. line, feeling jittery and nervous... and especially aware of the irony of it, for never in his life had the Wrecker felt this way. << "Hey, Sunshine? So, uh… guess were both idiots, huh?" >>

[Ratchet]

Like a mesh bandage.  Even Ratchet had to chuckle a little at that one.

     To:  @wheeljack

You're the one who told me to 'rip it off and get it over with', weren't you?

He flushed as the next series of texts came through, realizing his own stupidity.  Wheeljack hadn't been lying at all.  He really did love him.  Here he had been, worried that that might not have been the case.  Before he could respond via text, that's when Wheeljack had called him through his personal commlink channel.  Naturally, he pinged him back.

<< "I guess the both of us are.  When I got that message when I awoke, I had been ecstatic at first, but then some part of me had worried that perhaps it hadn't been meant for me.  But now that I know that you meant it, I feel a whole lot better." >>  The medic sighed with relief, his tone of voice starting to relax after the anxiety they had inadvertently caused each other.

<< "I think... I love you, too." >>